Who Ever Said Overcoming Self-Defeat Was Easy?

As I sit here at my computer, to the front of me is my window portraying a winter wonderland, to the back of me is a pile of dirty clothes, to the left of me is my wall of Love & Basketball quotes, and to the right of me is a mirror reflecting an image of a young woman who is self-defeated. This young woman is me.

It is so easy to dish out advice to other people about how to overcome and how to face adversity. It comes second nature to me; I love helping out other people if they are in a mental and emotional jam, but I can't seem to do the same for myself. I have been in a mental slump for about 26 hours now, and I say it is time to get out of it. If I continue to be in this slump, I will let my teammates and coaches down and that is something I have always feared of doing. That is the worst thing I can do; it would be selfish to make my team pay for my frustrations .

The first thing I think I need to do is smile. Anyone should be able to smile after a hard-fought win, but I just couldn't. I cannot go back in time, instead I will live for right now and right now only. Smiling is probably one of the most simple and healthiest therapies. It may be hard at times, but it's free! a lot of things don't come free these days, but a smile most definitely does.

Second thing, I need to do is accept responsibility. I can't keep holding on to past mistakes. I have to take responsibility for my actions and improve my attitude for my team. To not take responsibility for my actions would be like playing the victim. The world doesn't revolve around one single person. And I for sure don't want to be the victim in any situation, but rather the hero.

Third thing is that I need to learn how to finish what I started. Never do I want any of my tasks, goals, or commitments be left undone and unfinished, it would put myself and the people around me in jeopardy. It is difficult to feel good about your abilities if you haven't experienced the success and rewards from it, so then that's when I work even harder to get there and not feel sorry for myself that nothing is going my way.

I am my worst critic. It is a learning experience, and it is going to take time, but I have to be proactive about it. I am going to take the initiative and work hard at overcoming this self-defeating behavior. Bruises from a tough game can hurt for days. Scratches from a pick up game can leave long-lasting welts. Scars from self-defeat can virtually stay on your body forever, unless you turn the situation around and demonstrate a positive attitude as much as you can. 

I am ready to make the change.

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